ABOUT Me (ARTISTIC OR OTHERWISE)
The Long Story
What? You want to know about me? After that beautiful intro I so painstakingly wrote? Sure thing, bub. I could talk about me for hours. Days even. I'm not that conceited, I'm just an open book. A really long book. A huge series of novels where the author got far too long winded about the descriptions of the surroundings and the movie adaptation will never be good enough because to fit all the details in would make the movie at least two days long. I am that kind of book. The kind of book I use to step on because I'm too short to reach the cabinet. Don't look down on me.
Hmm, but where to start that book? Most would say "the beginning" but conventional story telling is for people who don't think like Quentin Tarantino. Of course, I don't think like Quentin Tarantino, but I do enjoy his movies and like his use of nonlinear narratives. That being said, let's just recap the intro and elaborate from there. I'm sure you don't wanna hear about my childhood and that time I snuck on the bus headed for a field trip I didn't have a permission slip for and felt like a bad boy all day. No, let's recap on the parts of my childhood where I drew things. It started when I was five and my grandpa bought me a Sonic the Hedgehog comic at a gas station. I loved everything about it. It was like story books but BETTER because you got to see the action and not just read about it and see a single picture illustrating the idea. Of course reading wasn't a great skill of mine back then, and my grandpa had to read most of it to me, but you get the point. Seeing it made it that much better.
From there I made my own character. Sparky the Fox was his name and he had cool adventures with Sonic. I was five so I was allowed to make shitty fan characters back then. Of course, unlike some people who make fan characters and cling to them for dear life regardless of how shitty they are (which is none of my business), I went straight to thinking about original ideas. I mean, if the Sonic guys could make Sonic, then I could make things too. And I did. I made two anthropomorphic dog characters named Chicago and Max, and made them kinda reflect me and my brother except they went on cool adventures and did awesome stuff and also they could skateboard and play guitar and stuff because those are the only skills you need to be certified COOL.
I drew them all the time, making cute little picture books and writing the story above the pictures and then ham-handedly stapling them together in all the wrong places. One time I drew Chicago singing "Roxanne" by The Police because I didn't know they were singing about a hooker. I was a lovely innocent child. Yeah, but already by nine it occurred to me that my art wasn't what I wanted it to be. The characters on the paper didn't look like the ones in my head. It didn't look like the way the characters on TV were drawn. It didn't look much better than other kids' drawings. This got me thinking. I needed to look at those things, the things I wanted my drawings to look like, and learn from them. So I did. I would look at the characters and try to imitate their shapes and lines with my own hand. I think the first drawing I did by looking at something that came out even remotely good was a picture of Rayman because I had just bought it for my 64. Hush now, I'm reminiscing. That was a pretty rad Christmas...after all, back in my day we didn't get video games at the drop of a hat. No, we had to wait until Christmases and birthdays and pray to the video game gods that our parents knew which one to buy because they all looked the same. Hmm...yes, I do suppose I'm getting off topic. And sounding old. I don't like sounding old. I'm only 27-HEY YOU KIDS, GET OFFA MY LAWN DAMMIT! Where was I? RIGHT. Eventually I started training my hand to work the correct way, and once my art started getting recognized as "good" (read "good for my age"), people started throwing drawing books my way. Most were crap (draw this bear in five stages!), but some were helpful. Drawing books about Marvel super heroes and cartoon characters of the Disney and Looney Tunes variety were nice to have. I learned that it's easier to draw hands if you start with a circle first. Hell, most things are easier to draw if you start with a circle first.
Anyway, totally taught myself basic art *flexes drawing hand* No biggie. Okay, but in all seriousness, I didn't get active on the internet until I was like fifteen because I came from a poor family (and I continue to be poor but not quite as much) and good computers and internet were hard to come by. Don't mock me people who were cool enough to have internet in the 90's! I HAD JURASSIC PARK DINOSAURS AND WAS COOL ENOUGH. But as I was saying, once I got online I started looking at other people's fan art and junk, and ended up joining Fanart Central (where you can still find my gross old gallery). I learned many things from my online peers from there, and eventually I ended up getting brave enough to join DeviantArt where my gallery is still currently active. There are many years of immaturity, growing, and drawing a lot of weird shit on those sites. Anyhow, that all basically shaped me and my art into the big mess of gross colors we are today. Even now my art continues to grow and shape and evolve, and things I post on here now will eventually be deemed "old and gross" and replaced with "new and better" pieces at some point. Hopefully you fastened your seat belt, this train is the kind Ozzy Osbourne warned you about and it makes frequent stops and changes directions at breakneck speeds.
Anyhow, if you came to this about section wanting to know more about me personally and not my metaphorical ride through the art world, I suppose I can provide that information as well. Like I said, open book. Long winded book that-oops, was trailing off again. Let's get to the point this time. My name is Jonny Ezra Roberts. My common alias is flammingcorn characterized by being all lowercase and misspelled. There's a handful of other aliases too, but they're not remotely important right now. Also, "flaming corn" is the correct pronunciation, though I won't mind if you pronounce it as spelled because several do.
My likes boiled down to all basicness is drawing (obviously), writing, voice acting, listening to pretty much any music (and I mean ANY. You bet your sweet ass I love polka), tacos, Steve Buscemi, cats, chocolate milk, cute Band-Aids (even though most of them have latex in them and I can't wear them due to my latex allergy), baseball bats, masks, faceless characters in general, cartoons, comics, musicals, crack pairings, fandoms that are either too big and become terrible or are too small and no one wants to participate, cosplay, conventions (comic, anime, horror, etc.), prop building, some video games (BioShock and TF2 mostly but I like a few others and play them to my best ability which is shoddy at best), reminiscing about the 90's (only true 90's kids will feel me), piercings and tattoos, cool hair (speaking of which, my hair WILL change periodically I.E. it changes like three or more times a year no exaggeration), torture devices (I promise I'm not a weirdo, the workings behind them are fascinating as hell), gross bright colors, post apocalyptic wastelands, dystopias in general, deserts, animation, and screaming and/or being loud in general. Hmm. Maybe that wasn't as boiled down to all basicness as I had intended. Oh, well...
Dislikes aren't something I like to bring up really, since we all have different tastes, but there are a few I don't mind listing. These include Family Guy (and Seth MacFarlane's work in general except for American Dad because ROGER), the way Nancy Grace and Jane Velez-Mitchell impose their opinions onto people, PETA, Johnny Test, and white shoes. Fite meh, bro. No, but seriously, these are just my opinions. I intend to keep things that really start fights under a tight lid, such as my religious and political standpoints. Please don't ask me about them. Also, I might really fight you over Johnny Test because it's really just horrible.
I guess I'm done here, but here's a list of my favorite things for gits and shiggles:
Candy: Chocolate covered gummy bears
Colors: Lime green, neon orange, raspberry, most shades of purple, gray, and black
Animals: Cats, koalas, hermit crabs, and bees, though I also really like ungulates and marine life in general as well
Book: The Wonderful Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum
Movies: There are far too many because I’m a movie fanatic but we’ll narrow it down to Mad Max Fury Road, Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, Inglourious Basterds, Reservoir Dogs, Fargo, The LEGO Movie, Wreck-It Ralph, Hot Fuzz, O Brother Where Art Thou?, Little Miss Sunshine, Shaun of the Dead, the Back to the Future trilogy, Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny, Repo! The Genetic Opera, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Cool World, Pet Sematary Two, and Trick ‘r Treat
Songs: No Children by The Mountain Goats, Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men, Ass Backwards by Mindless Self Indulgence, Look Alive Sunshine/Na Na Na by My Chemical Romance, and probably Older Crowd by mc chris
Bands/Musicians: I listen to like everything but my main bands and such are Mindless Self Indulgence, My Chemical Romance, mc chris, Blood on the Dance Floor, Daft Punk, The Offspring, Oingo Boingo, Alice Cooper, Misfits, and Bad4Good
Artists: Jamie Hewlett, Jill Thompson, Jhonen Vasquez, Tim Burton, and sort of Danny Antonucci and Tom Warburton
Shows (non cartoon): Married... With Children, Friends, most late 80's-early 90's sitcoms, a handful of TLC and Syfy "reality" shows
Cartoons: Rick and Morty, King of the Hill, Moral Orel, Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law, Home Movies, Steven Universe, Gravity Falls, Over the Garden Wall, Adventure Time, Invader Zim, pretty much every 90's and some 80's cartoons ever
Animes: Nightwalker: The Midnight Detective, Black Butler/Kiroshitsuji, DRAMAtical Muder, One Punch Man, and I still kinda like Bleach and Full Metal Alchemist…been meaning to try some newer animes out
Comics: Not Brand ECHH, What The--?!, Deadpool, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, Sky Doll, Lenore the Cute Little Dead Girl, Watchmen...used to really be into Uncanny X-Men, but it's been a while
Numbers: 9, 12, 13, and 32
Ice Cream: Mint chocolate chip, Superman, and any kind of piña colada flavored ice cream (although anything piña colada flavored is a win in my book)
Video Games: BioShock (all three of 'em), Fable II, Team Fortress 2, Animal Crossing New Leaf, Garry's Mod, Earthbound, Five Nights at Freddy's, Super Mario RPG Legend of the Seven Stars, Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time, Psychonauts, basically all the Tony Hawk games between Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2 and Tony Hawk's American Wasteland, the first couple of Guitar Heroes before people started being dicks about it, OFF, every single Pokemon EVER (not really, just the main games mostly), and Fallout 3.
Foods: MEAT, macaroni and cheese, most Italian foods (or well at least the pasta oriented ones), shrimp lo mein, Arby's, tacos, a lotta dairy and fruit but mostly cheese and pineapples, Sonic or just breakfast burritos
Characters: Rick Sanchez, Marvin the Martian, Spades Slick, Scout, Soldier, Orko, The Batter, Sander Cohen, Scootaloo, Good Cop/Bad Cop, Bill Cipher, Deadpool, Cutman, Rorschach, Lemongrab, Gargamel, and Rick Sanchez
Otherwise feel free to ask me about my cats!
Hmm, but where to start that book? Most would say "the beginning" but conventional story telling is for people who don't think like Quentin Tarantino. Of course, I don't think like Quentin Tarantino, but I do enjoy his movies and like his use of nonlinear narratives. That being said, let's just recap the intro and elaborate from there. I'm sure you don't wanna hear about my childhood and that time I snuck on the bus headed for a field trip I didn't have a permission slip for and felt like a bad boy all day. No, let's recap on the parts of my childhood where I drew things. It started when I was five and my grandpa bought me a Sonic the Hedgehog comic at a gas station. I loved everything about it. It was like story books but BETTER because you got to see the action and not just read about it and see a single picture illustrating the idea. Of course reading wasn't a great skill of mine back then, and my grandpa had to read most of it to me, but you get the point. Seeing it made it that much better.
From there I made my own character. Sparky the Fox was his name and he had cool adventures with Sonic. I was five so I was allowed to make shitty fan characters back then. Of course, unlike some people who make fan characters and cling to them for dear life regardless of how shitty they are (which is none of my business), I went straight to thinking about original ideas. I mean, if the Sonic guys could make Sonic, then I could make things too. And I did. I made two anthropomorphic dog characters named Chicago and Max, and made them kinda reflect me and my brother except they went on cool adventures and did awesome stuff and also they could skateboard and play guitar and stuff because those are the only skills you need to be certified COOL.
I drew them all the time, making cute little picture books and writing the story above the pictures and then ham-handedly stapling them together in all the wrong places. One time I drew Chicago singing "Roxanne" by The Police because I didn't know they were singing about a hooker. I was a lovely innocent child. Yeah, but already by nine it occurred to me that my art wasn't what I wanted it to be. The characters on the paper didn't look like the ones in my head. It didn't look like the way the characters on TV were drawn. It didn't look much better than other kids' drawings. This got me thinking. I needed to look at those things, the things I wanted my drawings to look like, and learn from them. So I did. I would look at the characters and try to imitate their shapes and lines with my own hand. I think the first drawing I did by looking at something that came out even remotely good was a picture of Rayman because I had just bought it for my 64. Hush now, I'm reminiscing. That was a pretty rad Christmas...after all, back in my day we didn't get video games at the drop of a hat. No, we had to wait until Christmases and birthdays and pray to the video game gods that our parents knew which one to buy because they all looked the same. Hmm...yes, I do suppose I'm getting off topic. And sounding old. I don't like sounding old. I'm only 27-HEY YOU KIDS, GET OFFA MY LAWN DAMMIT! Where was I? RIGHT. Eventually I started training my hand to work the correct way, and once my art started getting recognized as "good" (read "good for my age"), people started throwing drawing books my way. Most were crap (draw this bear in five stages!), but some were helpful. Drawing books about Marvel super heroes and cartoon characters of the Disney and Looney Tunes variety were nice to have. I learned that it's easier to draw hands if you start with a circle first. Hell, most things are easier to draw if you start with a circle first.
Anyway, totally taught myself basic art *flexes drawing hand* No biggie. Okay, but in all seriousness, I didn't get active on the internet until I was like fifteen because I came from a poor family (and I continue to be poor but not quite as much) and good computers and internet were hard to come by. Don't mock me people who were cool enough to have internet in the 90's! I HAD JURASSIC PARK DINOSAURS AND WAS COOL ENOUGH. But as I was saying, once I got online I started looking at other people's fan art and junk, and ended up joining Fanart Central (where you can still find my gross old gallery). I learned many things from my online peers from there, and eventually I ended up getting brave enough to join DeviantArt where my gallery is still currently active. There are many years of immaturity, growing, and drawing a lot of weird shit on those sites. Anyhow, that all basically shaped me and my art into the big mess of gross colors we are today. Even now my art continues to grow and shape and evolve, and things I post on here now will eventually be deemed "old and gross" and replaced with "new and better" pieces at some point. Hopefully you fastened your seat belt, this train is the kind Ozzy Osbourne warned you about and it makes frequent stops and changes directions at breakneck speeds.
Anyhow, if you came to this about section wanting to know more about me personally and not my metaphorical ride through the art world, I suppose I can provide that information as well. Like I said, open book. Long winded book that-oops, was trailing off again. Let's get to the point this time. My name is Jonny Ezra Roberts. My common alias is flammingcorn characterized by being all lowercase and misspelled. There's a handful of other aliases too, but they're not remotely important right now. Also, "flaming corn" is the correct pronunciation, though I won't mind if you pronounce it as spelled because several do.
My likes boiled down to all basicness is drawing (obviously), writing, voice acting, listening to pretty much any music (and I mean ANY. You bet your sweet ass I love polka), tacos, Steve Buscemi, cats, chocolate milk, cute Band-Aids (even though most of them have latex in them and I can't wear them due to my latex allergy), baseball bats, masks, faceless characters in general, cartoons, comics, musicals, crack pairings, fandoms that are either too big and become terrible or are too small and no one wants to participate, cosplay, conventions (comic, anime, horror, etc.), prop building, some video games (BioShock and TF2 mostly but I like a few others and play them to my best ability which is shoddy at best), reminiscing about the 90's (only true 90's kids will feel me), piercings and tattoos, cool hair (speaking of which, my hair WILL change periodically I.E. it changes like three or more times a year no exaggeration), torture devices (I promise I'm not a weirdo, the workings behind them are fascinating as hell), gross bright colors, post apocalyptic wastelands, dystopias in general, deserts, animation, and screaming and/or being loud in general. Hmm. Maybe that wasn't as boiled down to all basicness as I had intended. Oh, well...
Dislikes aren't something I like to bring up really, since we all have different tastes, but there are a few I don't mind listing. These include Family Guy (and Seth MacFarlane's work in general except for American Dad because ROGER), the way Nancy Grace and Jane Velez-Mitchell impose their opinions onto people, PETA, Johnny Test, and white shoes. Fite meh, bro. No, but seriously, these are just my opinions. I intend to keep things that really start fights under a tight lid, such as my religious and political standpoints. Please don't ask me about them. Also, I might really fight you over Johnny Test because it's really just horrible.
I guess I'm done here, but here's a list of my favorite things for gits and shiggles:
Candy: Chocolate covered gummy bears
Colors: Lime green, neon orange, raspberry, most shades of purple, gray, and black
Animals: Cats, koalas, hermit crabs, and bees, though I also really like ungulates and marine life in general as well
Book: The Wonderful Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum
Movies: There are far too many because I’m a movie fanatic but we’ll narrow it down to Mad Max Fury Road, Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, Inglourious Basterds, Reservoir Dogs, Fargo, The LEGO Movie, Wreck-It Ralph, Hot Fuzz, O Brother Where Art Thou?, Little Miss Sunshine, Shaun of the Dead, the Back to the Future trilogy, Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny, Repo! The Genetic Opera, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Cool World, Pet Sematary Two, and Trick ‘r Treat
Songs: No Children by The Mountain Goats, Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men, Ass Backwards by Mindless Self Indulgence, Look Alive Sunshine/Na Na Na by My Chemical Romance, and probably Older Crowd by mc chris
Bands/Musicians: I listen to like everything but my main bands and such are Mindless Self Indulgence, My Chemical Romance, mc chris, Blood on the Dance Floor, Daft Punk, The Offspring, Oingo Boingo, Alice Cooper, Misfits, and Bad4Good
Artists: Jamie Hewlett, Jill Thompson, Jhonen Vasquez, Tim Burton, and sort of Danny Antonucci and Tom Warburton
Shows (non cartoon): Married... With Children, Friends, most late 80's-early 90's sitcoms, a handful of TLC and Syfy "reality" shows
Cartoons: Rick and Morty, King of the Hill, Moral Orel, Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law, Home Movies, Steven Universe, Gravity Falls, Over the Garden Wall, Adventure Time, Invader Zim, pretty much every 90's and some 80's cartoons ever
Animes: Nightwalker: The Midnight Detective, Black Butler/Kiroshitsuji, DRAMAtical Muder, One Punch Man, and I still kinda like Bleach and Full Metal Alchemist…been meaning to try some newer animes out
Comics: Not Brand ECHH, What The--?!, Deadpool, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, Sky Doll, Lenore the Cute Little Dead Girl, Watchmen...used to really be into Uncanny X-Men, but it's been a while
Numbers: 9, 12, 13, and 32
Ice Cream: Mint chocolate chip, Superman, and any kind of piña colada flavored ice cream (although anything piña colada flavored is a win in my book)
Video Games: BioShock (all three of 'em), Fable II, Team Fortress 2, Animal Crossing New Leaf, Garry's Mod, Earthbound, Five Nights at Freddy's, Super Mario RPG Legend of the Seven Stars, Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time, Psychonauts, basically all the Tony Hawk games between Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2 and Tony Hawk's American Wasteland, the first couple of Guitar Heroes before people started being dicks about it, OFF, every single Pokemon EVER (not really, just the main games mostly), and Fallout 3.
Foods: MEAT, macaroni and cheese, most Italian foods (or well at least the pasta oriented ones), shrimp lo mein, Arby's, tacos, a lotta dairy and fruit but mostly cheese and pineapples, Sonic or just breakfast burritos
Characters: Rick Sanchez, Marvin the Martian, Spades Slick, Scout, Soldier, Orko, The Batter, Sander Cohen, Scootaloo, Good Cop/Bad Cop, Bill Cipher, Deadpool, Cutman, Rorschach, Lemongrab, Gargamel, and Rick Sanchez
Otherwise feel free to ask me about my cats!
Here I am!
I was drunk in this picture